you leave me homesick for those arms,
oh how i wander and wander, somehow
you always seem to be ahead of me.
will you turn around and wait for me, or
will you disappear into the velvet orange
sun, blinding me until I lose sight?
i can’t keep up, but how i will still run and
run. because i love you, and i wish not to
ever see your back to me again. the rays
of sun on your backbone conquered me
in it’s unearthly beauty, but it will always
be the face i know so blind i long for.
and maybe as long as our eyes keep
locked, i will dangerously slip my finger
down your spine.
but don’t you try to carry the weight
of the world. it is too much for you
to bear all alone.
you will fall apart in pieces, but the
guilt isn’t yours. they may refuse to
see for themselves, they may try to
pull such heaviness onto you. don’t
let them ever break you. however
the tears save nothing, maybe one
day you will get a chance to save
the world and lighten it’s weight.
maybe one day we can carry it all
when fear came knocking on my front door,
i couldn’t hide. it stood by my side when i had
nothing, so in all nothingness i still had the fright
i wished the least to be true. i wanted the dreams
i had dream during the rain of falling stars, and i
craved for the light to conquer the darkness that,
even in it’s anonymity, became an old friend of
mine. it knew about the things in my head and
made them real, and for that i could never forgive.
even among all my failed attempt in begging and
screaming for you to go easy on me, you were
among the unforgiveness you still soothed my
diseased brain at five in the morning, but only
after feeding of my pain and fear. are you so
merciless a friend, to let my nights go unsleeping
and frightened? the company you have kept me
has been both unpleasant and familiar, and
maybe I could miss you in the mornings, but
never in the dark.
if only the stars were vast friends.